I came out to my supervisor

I am on a roll!  It feels like the end of “coming out at work” is in sight.  This may have been the biggest hurdle, because it seemed the most unpredictable – I wasn’t sure how she’d react.  Or rather, I could deduce how she might react at different times – I just had to make sure to pick a good time…

She had been out on medical leave for 6 weeks, and I expected there to be a transitional period when she came back.  So I didn’t plan / put any pressure on myself to say anything in the foreseeable future.  But once she was back, I realized it did seem to be good timing.  I dreaded approaching her while she was in her office (if I could even catch her in there).  It seemed so daunting to start such a conversation from scratch, but that’s exactly what I planned on doing, since we’d be in a semi-private location.

Last Wednesday, however, I was running the auto-scrubber in the cafeteria, when she came up to me to explain some extra work my co-worker and I would be doing that night.  I then turned the auto-scrubber back on, but she came back to me with something else.  She had some news about someone who used to teach at our school years ago.  She was relating to me as another worker with history in the building, something she has never done before.  Sort of, “I knew you’d remember her, so I thought I’d tell you.”  It was a bonding moment, as much as seems possible between us.  I realized, this is the time to tell her!  We were already conversing (not a common thing) and all I have to do is segue, as opposed to start from nothing.

I said, “Oh, I’ve got two things to run by you.”  I told her about surgery and needing time off first.  She was totally fine with that and didn’t ask any questions.  I was concerned she might.  I dreaded telling her I was taking off more time, since I took so much time last year.  It went so smoothly!  Then I added that I have something else that is more of a long-term thing.  I told her I’m changing my name and pronouns to he/him/his.  That I already have, in fact, except for at work.  She said that this must be a long term thing because this is the first she’s heard of it!  I assured her she was one of the first people I’m telling.  (I strongly suspect that she already knew something, because I came out to the head of the kitchen a couple of months ago, and they talk about everything.  That may have been somewhat strategic on my part.)

The rest of the conversation centered around her advising me about what I would be able to do, when.  She said I’d have to wait until I’ve legally made changes.  Then I should go to the principal, and she will deal with it in her own way.  I don’t believe I do need to wait until my name is legally changed (and I’m not planning to change my gender), and I think I have some say about how I come out and when, but I’m not about to jump ahead to the next steps anytime soon anyway.  I told her I am going by Kameron, and she even said, “I like it.”

We wrapped up the conversation, which went so well, considering.  I turned the auto-scrubber back on and could not stop smiling.  I had been dreading this for so long, and it just organically occurred in the moment.  I was on turbo charge for the rest of the day.  In my mind, I kept jumping ahead to what I would have to do next, and then reminding myself to just be in this moment, and feel this elation that doing this thing had created.

I really can’t envision what I’ll be doing next.  Which means I should just wait for a while until it seems clear.  (It would be talking to the principal again – something I can tell I’m not ready for right now.)

For now – WHEEEEEEE!

Other related posts:

I came out to the principal

I came out to the head of the kitchen

I came out to my co-worker


14 Comments on “I came out to my supervisor”

  1. PlainT says:

    Congratulations Kameron!!!

    Like

  2. That’s awesome, congratulations on another step taken! 🙂

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  3. Yay! That’s awesome, well done 🙂

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  4. Jamie Ray says:

    Great that you are out to your supervisor – she sounds like she will be OK with everything.
    I waited to tell people at work about my name change until it was legal so that if anyone had a problem with it they would have to call me by my legal name. Despite the paperwork hassle and the expense, I really like having all my ID, credit cards, checks, and paystubs in my name.

    Like

  5. Lesboi says:

    That’s awesome! Congrats Kameron!!!

    Like

  6. Well done Kameron. Onwards and upward!

    Like

  7. CallmeThey says:

    Congrats! Having people be cool when you come out to them is THE BEST!

    Like

  8. butchcountry67 says:

    awesome my friend, a HUGE Congratulations, that was a very big leap you took and you landed on your feet ! Kameron is a good strong name 🙂

    Like

  9. Emily Gritz says:

    Congratulations, Kameron! Delighted for you!

    Like

  10. cistotrans says:

    Hooray! So glad to hear it was a non-event like it should be!

    Like

  11. Congratulations! This is wonderful news. What a weight off your shoulders.

    Like

  12. Dexxy says:

    Congrats best of luck with everything

    Like


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