1.25 years on T without noticeable masculinizing changes
Posted: June 18, 2014 Filed under: Testosterone, Uncategorized | Tags: androgyny, gender identity, genderqueer, hormone replacement therapy, lgbt, lgbtq, mental health, non-binary, queer, testosterone, trans, transgender, transition 14 CommentsI’ve been previously writing this ongoing series as “__ months/years on T without physical changes,” but I decided to change the wording from “physical changes” to “noticeable masculinizing changes” …a little more accurate. There have been some physical changes. But, ultimately, they have not added up to a more masculine gender presentation, which has been what I’m aiming for.
A quick rundown of the physical changes I have seen:
(All of these occurred within the first 2 months and then plateaued out, except the ones that have an asterisk – they started to become noticeable around the one year mark.)
- muscle growth, mostly in shoulders, chest, and abs
- moderate clitoral growth
- smell stinkier, need to shower more, get sweaty and sticky, get grosser quicker
- more peach fuzz on face, mustache teeniest-tiniest bit darker
- hairier butt crack*
- slightly more hair on thighs, where I apply the gel*
All these changes are so slight. I don’t think I look any different. Also, my voice sounds the same to me. I would say my range has shifted oh-so subtly (like when trying to sing or make high pitched or low pitched noises, which I like to do a lot), but my speaking voice is the same.
Here are a couple of pictures:
1.25 years on testosterone
one year on testosterone
before testosterone
Also, please note my new summer fashion, in the first photo. I cut the sleeves off of a couple of western-style shirts, to wear over t-shirts or tank tops. The placement of the pockets & snaps helps hide what’s going on with the fact that I have a chest. In the winter, I just layer, and it’s awesome. In the summer, it is hot! Right?! If I can get away without wearing a binder, I will. (And I am grateful every single day for that.) This layered look just might do the trick. I do imagine that I will get top surgery one day. I always start thinking about it much more in the summer. What an incredible feeling it would be to just wear a tank top and be done with it!
I have not missed a day yet, applying 1.25 grams of Androgel 1% per day. The internal effects make it more than worthwhile. A quick rundown of those:
- lower levels of anxiety
- higher sex drive
- less instances of dissociating / more present in my body
- increased ability to experience bodily sensations
- more awareness of the world around me
- increased sensitivity to pain
- ability to let things just roll off my shoulders
- a lot of these are rewording similar themes: basically, a greater sense of well being!
If you wanna look back at where I’ve been, here are some past posts about this topic:
- Five months on T without physical changes
- Eight months on T without physical changes
- Eleven months on T without physical changes
- One year on T without physical changes
And also, a video about it, at the one year mark.
janitorqueer 
Wow sounds like your moving closer to your goal, congratulations!
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Thank you!
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One physical change I have noticed in you since taking T is that the large mass at your left temple seems to have vanished completely.
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Ah yes (see image #3 for visual). Although it seems to have just magically disappeared, I actually underwent a mass-ectomy. It wasn’t covered by insurance, but I’m glad to be rid of that 8-11 lbs – it was weighing me down!
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I think your face has gotten wider, slightly more masculine.
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This is great. Do you know what your free testosterone level is taking the daily dose that you take? I am riding the fence right now of androgynizing and masculinizing with 200 whatever measurement of free T in my system. I wonder what the upper limit of T is while continuing to stay androgynous. Do you have a sense of this? I see my hormone doc Monday and will get new labs done and either increase or not – my gut tells me I need more and while I feel myself to be a man, I am not sure if I am ready for the radical changes of fully masculinizing.
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My levels checked in at 102.3 (which means I basically doubled my level, which is pretty huge) – I’m not sure if this is the free testosterone level or just testosterone overall, but it was the one measurement on my blood test for testosterone, so I’m guessing it’s the free testosterone?
Yes, I wonder what the upper limit is too! I imagine it varies for everyone. My gut feeling is telling me that I’m pretty close to it though, which in some ways is a bummer because a part of me is curious what more T would feel like.
I’ll be interested to find out what you decide to do!
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I will be curious as well to see what I decide to do. before T I literally had zero free T in my system. So 200 is a good jump and I do feel good and I am also aware I am not there yet – wherever there is. I have some internal feeling you know guiding and driving me.
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thanks for this post, it was very informative and helpful to me! do you know how many milligrams of T you apply each day?
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I do know! It is 12.5mg/day. (It’s 1.25 grams – or 1250mg – of gel, volume-wise, and the concentrate percentage is 1%, which means it’s 12.5mg of T.) It’s Androgel, and that equals one pump per day.
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Goddamn do you have awesome hair.
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Haha thanks! It’s the one and only good thing about high humidity summers: The weather whispers to my curls, “Alright, time to shape up!”
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I’ve never actually heard of someone getting huge results on androgel. I knew someone who was on it for 2 years with similar results to what you’ve seen, someone else who just recently went off it after a year with only mild results (I think slightly more than you, but not much), etc.
Given the change in your T levels, it’s a bit odd to me. From people who get the injections, I generally hear that they get more changes than this in a manner of months/weeks. If the gel does give small results, though, I think it’s good that it’s available because not everyone wants the huge results- so this is a good option for those who prefer milder/slower changes.
It sounds like you’re not unhappy with the results, which is what matters. 🙂 I’m glad that it’s helping you emotionally!
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Yeah, the gel is definitely a good option for some people. And yeah, I’m not unhappy with the results. I’m thrilled with the results! Haha.
And the change in my T levels does make some sense to me, in terms of the changes I have seen. If I’m at 102 ng/dl, that’s slightly higher than normal female ranges (14-75), but still pretty far from normal male ranges (which, I believe, are anywhere from 300-800).
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